Something To Marinate On

Thought for Today

"You really don't become what you want. You become what you believe."
—Oprah

An Episode of Oprah

There recently was an episode of Oprah with a woman who was in an abusive marriage. I'm an avid Oprah viewer but the commercials for this particular show were so disturbing that I couldn't even bring myself to watch it. In the commercials you could hear and see this woman's husband cursing and beating her because he had their teenage son video tape it. All a little too much for me, but I do realize that there are many women and young girls who live that life everyday.
In college, a friend was in a situation where she was being beaten. We would see her in classes with black eyes and bruises but it still took a while to ask her what was going on; even though we knew. Of course at first she lied but finally she did admit that she needed some help. Why did it take so long to ask a friend if she needed help when the answer was already so clear? Well its a curious thing, but somehow the person who is being abused either believes that they deserve it or that being beaten is a form of love. Either way as a friend, you know that they are more apt to be defensive and not receptive to help.
I recently heard some advice on the Steve Harvey show about how to deal with a loved one in these types of situations. Steve gave the advice to not confront your loved one but go straight to the abuser or send that unscrupulous cousin or nephew that's been in jail once or twice; basically someone who doesn't really have good sense! You get that person to go and talk to the abuser and basically say "Hey look, we all know what's going on so you don't even have to try to deny it. You need to stay away from (insert name here) or some real bad things might happen to you." Then if you'd like to throw some extra stuff in there, then you can use a couple of lines from Bad Boys 2 when that boy came to pick up Marcus's daughter and Mike asked him if he ever slept with a man. You know what I'm talking about if you've seen the movie. Then chop the dude in the throat so he can't breathe...
I thought this was great advice. But if you'd like some PhD advice, I've got that too click on this link: http://www.oprah.com/tows/pastshows/200705/tows_past_20070508_c.jhtml

I personally like and will follow the Steve Harvey advice should there be another person in my life who needs this kind of help. I surely will not be going to any one's apartment to ask their crazy boyfriend to leave peacefully anymore, believe me crazy and peaceful don't go together. You have to fight crazy with crazy; send your crazy cousin to handle business.

Knowing When

Have you ever been conflicted with the thoughts of something that you needed to get off your mind? Something that you really felt like you had to express to someone else? Most times when I feel like that, I try to really think about why I want to say whatever it is that's on my mind. Is it for my benefit or for someone else? Will the conversation actually have a positive outcome? If I can't answer the questions in a positive manner I usually keep my thoughts to myself. Not everything needs to be said, and if it does need to be spoken it doesn't have to be said by me. It's important to me to make my word count and sometimes above all silence is golden.

Because I've been told to...

I've had some very busy days at work and at home and haven't really had a chance to post. I've been meaning to post a quote of the day for the last week but I had to today because I just know God wants me to. I was watching a movie and had to rewind it 3x's to listen to this line again and again:
"Who you chose to have around you, let you know who you are."

I've heard this quote before but stated differently as I'm sure you have too, "Birds of a feather flock together", but for some reason when I heard it in that movie it made so much more sense to me. Then today I received an email with the following message:

Who are you around?Are the people around you your idea of who you wanna be? If you want to be in fashion, go to 7th Ave!! Wanna be a movie star??? Go to Hollywood!!! Ducks hang with ducks! Frogs jump with frogs! Where are you going? What is your aim? Watch the company you keep!!! (Remember!) If you keep going to the barber shop, you're bound to get a hair cut!!!

I knew I had to make this post and stop putting it off. Someone out there needs to read it. Maybe it was me or maybe it's you but I know it's important not to put things off as coincidences. God makes all things happen.

Ever wonder??

Have you ever thought what it would be like to be in someone else? Not in the sense that you want to be someone else but just the thought of what someone else goes through. I find myself looking at people sometimes and just wondering what's going on in their head. I always try to imagine what someone else might be going through because I think as we all get wrapped up in the story of our own lives we become so detached from other people that we can't related to other's problem. Of course your situation becomes "different" because it's your problem and of course no one else could possibly understand. I think when we all realize that just about every situation boils down to being the same then it will be a little easier to stop blaming others for not understanding us.

Making the Right Choices

At times; although I am 28 years old, married, and a mother, I still feel like a little kid. I know that I don't always make the right decisions but I always try to be true to myself and not hurt the people around me. I don't even know what to write here because I really can't express what I'm feeling in a vague but specific way. I guess I can sum up what I want to say by saying this; if intention rules the world then I am in a good place because I don't go out in the world EVER with negative intentions. Hopefully intent does mean something.